In limerence recovery it is important to assess exactly how you are attempting to seduce your limerent object. One aspect of sexual intrigue that you may be using is akin to The Japanese Tea Ceremony. If you look at the beautiful way the Tea Ceremony is prepared, you will see how preciously intimate this process is, how delicate and how refined this simple ritual between two people becomes. The Tea Ceremony is the ordinary made art, and it may be that you are also using this way of being to influence and attract your limerent object.
A shared task can become an exquisite moment between two people, or it can be a way of attempting to hook someone. If you have discovered something that you repeatedly use to draw another person to you and it feels as if you must do this, as if this need to catch interest becomes compulsive, becoming aware of this can help you see how you are heightening experience to capture attention.
This is most common with dismissive avaoidants, as avoidants often use their charm and charisma to draw partners to them. If you are relating to this, or recognise that the draw you have to another person resembles the Tea Ceremony, understanding how to dismantle this for yourself and/or protect yourself from it, can help you not be drawn into the protracted and painful dance of the insecure attachment types.
The relational tango that is set up by compulsively luring another into a seductive ritual that creates intensity, not intimacy, can be changed through limerence recovery. You don't have to lose your charm, you just have to learn how to use it without harming yourself or others.

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